Good News 109: School is Starting!

Ah, yes, everyone's favorite three-letter phrase...back-to-school. Time to pack up your new backpacks, sharpen your new pencils, and get ready to wake up at six in the morning again...every day! For states such as Florida and California, school is already in session, and if you're already feeling worn out by the classroom, here are four reasons why school is a pretty cool thing to have:

1. You get to see your friends every day! During summer, it can be hard to keep up with people. Vacations, summer camps, and just general laziness tend to get in the way of seeing your friends all the time. But now, no more! Now you know that every day, you have something to look forward to!You, you know, get an education. It's been statistically proven that getting a good education increases your salary when you're older. Plus, it's always good to be knowledgeable of the world around you. You wouldn't want to end up working at McDonald's, not knowing what England was or something. School makes you smarter, and that's always a good thing to be!You get to buy all-new school supplies. At least, I hope you do. I'm sure there are some people who like to reuse their old supplies, but I'm also sure that everyone out there has gotten new stuff at least once. If you have, I'm sure you can attest to the sheer joy of holding a new pre-sharpened pack of pencils, some binders that haven't been drawn all over by your friends when you weren't looking, shiny fresh notebooks all ready for you to doodle in instead of take notes, breathing in the smell of fresh paper and ink. Who wouldn't enjoy that?There are some really awesome teachers out there. You know the ones I'm talking about: the cool ones that let you work with your friends, always assign fun projects to do, and are forgiving if you're entire backpack (including that 50-page essay on guinea pigs you just spent the entire night writing) gets mauled by bears. Now some teachers can be pretty nasty, but at least you know you can catch a break with the awesome ones.
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So, is school starting again good news? I say: yes, yes it is. And if you ever wonder what exactly is the point of learning what the integer exponent of an obtuse polynomial is, just remember this list and remember that yes, school is pretty darn awesome.